Here’s a start.

Here are a couple of possible openings to the book.

Which do you like best? Perhaps this will help, imagine you’re a twelve year old boy — now, which do you like best? I’ll label them “A” and “B”


All the doors were locked, and the nightlight was lit, and everthing was perfectly still the night the bogeyman came.

He came in the tradtional way — through the closet. Now, the closet was located in a bedroom, and the bedroom was located around a boy. He was a little fellow and on this particular night he was all tuckered out. He’d had a busy day filled with sunshine and watermelons and cousins running through the sprinkler. But when his closet began to stir he opened a bleary eye.


There was once a boy who didn’t want to go to bed.

Now, I know what you’re thinking; but you wouldn’t want to go to bed either if your closet made noises in the middle of the night. His made faint, far away noises that sounded like hammers striking stone. they would go on for hours going: clink, clink, clink. Naturally, no one else ever heard them. The closet seemed to know when others were listening. And just as naturally his parents thought it was all just a phase and he’d grow out of it some day. Besides, they thought it was cute when he crawled into bed with them in the middle of the night.

Then one night, after a long day filled with sunshine . . ..

Go ahead and pick the one you like best and tell me why under comments.


Explore posts in the same categories: The Quest for the Fey Brand

One Comment on “Here’s a start.”

  1. nofranson Says:

    Both work, but I prefer option A. It actually feels like you’re in fairytale mode until you get hit with the bogeyman right at the end of that first lovely sentence. And, I think 12 and 13 year-old boys will want to get to the bogeymen right away, so you might as well grab them quick.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: